This is sort of the rest of the story of evening activities.
I had been growing and learning a lot, but at the end of the day I sort of zoned out. It was a christian camp but I never would have anything to do with it.
At the end of the day we always sang and then had a lesson. They started to sing but I was in the corner.
“Your praise will ever be on my lips, ever be on my lips. Your praise will ever on my lips, ever be on my lips. ”
Well that was true. A lot of us went around singing and never stopped.
“Christ forEVER GLORIFIED. So come on, come on, sing out to God, now with all we’ve got.”
Also true. They always glorified god and sang.
“The song is getting louder, WE CAN’T HIDE THIS LOVE AWAY. There’s nothing to fear now, send us in your power. Jesus take us all the way. FROM THE ROOFTOPS SING! I’m not ashamed of the one who saved my soul.”
They weren’t ashamed. Everyone knew I wasn’t comfortable with Christians but they went around being nice to me anyway. Everyone was so nice to me. Maybe that was what was what Christians had.
Faith started talking.
“I know that some of you came here unwilling. Christ can take your problems away if you take him into your heart, but you have to believe. Some of you came here to escape past problems. Things so bad that you can’t bear to think about them. I know that some of you have had it so bad that you can’t trust anyone anymore, but the rest of the summer will be terrible if you hold on to past things.
There was more but I didn’t hear it. I felt like she was speaking to me. I just wasn’t ready to open up but I wanted to forget it all.
Joy came over to me. She was a leader this week.
I made room for her to sit.
She asked what was wrong.
“Oh Joy. I feel like she is specking to me. I have had past problems. I am not a christian but everyone is being so nice.”
“You can always confide in Christ.” She said. “He can take everything away. I know you are not ready yet but we are just here to help. I understand. I had something like that too. I kept holding on the the problems but I became new in Christ. In Christ you are a new creation.”
I thought about what she said. Then without a word I got up and left.
I climbed into bed but it was a long time till I fell asleep.